Grassroots Gold Mine

“If there is any profit, the money will go toward furthering the cause of conservatism.”

Sherry Phillips, Tea Party Nation founder, on the whopping $549 it will cost a person just to get into the Teabaggin’ Clustersnuggle.  From today’s NYTimes. Note that Phillips also refused to discuss the reported $100,000.00 (yes, one hundred thousand dollars) that Palin is receiving to preach fist pump spew garbled homilies hopefully just show up speak. WTF people?

A hundred grand can do a LOT of *real* good. Hell, $549.00 can do a lot of good. You know, the kind of good that doesn’t involve shelling out one’s hard-earned dollars to be crammed in a hotel with a bunch of confused and angry white people who are being scammed by money-grubbing opportunists into thinking that the soggy chicken kiev they are eating is chock full of tasty patriotism. All while certain people are making BUCKETS and BUCKETS of money off of you.


How ‘grassroots’ is that?

Couldn’t YOU do so much more with your money? Seriously, even if charity isn’t your thing, then for the love of whatever you consider holy, KEEP your dollars and either spend them on yourself and your loved ones, or donate it to a REAL candidate of YOUR choice.

And yes, I know that not all TEAfolk are white, angry, and confused. Likewise, I know that not all white, angry, and confused people are TEAfolk. But I think we can all agree that the TEA functions aren’t exactly a shining example of irenic diversity.

You can read more about the quickly disintegrating “organized” total TEA whatever here or you can read more of my mockery on the subject of teabaggery, Palin or other such shenanigoats by pretty much picking a post at random.

No thanks. I'm married.

Grand Ol’ Clustersnuggle

Well, I can’t say that I am surprised to read this:

Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-Minn.) will speak at the first-ever National Tea Party Convention this upcoming February.

The announcement of plans for the conservative lawmaker to attend the Tennessee event came from Tea Party organizer Sherry Phillips via Twitter Tuesday.

Bachmann, who has emerged as a champion of the Tea Party movement, will join ex-Alaska Governor Sarah Palin at the convention for the “purpose of networking and supporting the movements’ multiple organizations principle goals.” Palin will be the “special keynote speaker” at the event, which is taking place at the Opryland Hotel in Nashville, Tennessee.

“Press will be allowed in a designated section of the lobby of the convention only and will not be allowed inside the convention,” reports the Nashville Post. “There will be no media allowed for the banquet with Sarah Palin.”

You can read the full Huff Po article here. Or, if you prefer your crazy full-on, maximum strength and utterly undiluted by reason, you can check out the superawesome teabaggerific site here. I want everyone to take a moment and let this sink in: The teabagger national convention is taking place in NASHVILLE. As in, Tennessee.  As in, WHERE I LIVE. Oh sweet science – does this mean we have to flee the state? Or does this mean we have to attend the event? Wait…

…I actually kind of want to go. Who wouldn’t like to experience a “media-free” Palin banquet? But then I read that tickets are $549. SERIOUSLY? What the FUCK people? You want to bitch about “those” people getting a penny of your money, but you are flush enough to fork over five hundred and forty-nine fucking dollars to watch a circle jerk of a clown car train wreck greed-fueled beauty pageant clusterfuck of a vortex of evil suck all that is good and smart and kind out of life?

HOLY SHIT my head just exploded.

So, here is my proposal. If you, good people of the interwebs, would like me, your southern female lawyer friend, to go and witness this shitacular event, I will add a PayPal donation function to this blog – and if I get $549 in donations, I will GO TO THE TEABAGGERAMA. For real. And I will blog the hell out of it. Pictures and all. And, I will have a sign contest and you all can design a sign for me to tote around. Comment and let me know if you want this to happen.

Good Ol' Choaking