No not humbled or worried. I just think that too many people make children focus only on themselves. After repeating and then reinforcing this behavior you have a very self centered, self involved human. Take a look around you at society and all of the self absorbed people. This is where it starts. The “look at me generation am I not the most wonderful thing in the world cater to my every whim I am not responsible” you name it-it is out there. I am just saying be careful to rear a well balanced self image in your child this one just appears to me to be over the top. Unless reigned in you will have a Lindsay Lohan , Paris Hilton, or worse yet Sarah Palin etc whom NEVER take responsibility. On the surface this video is cute but underneath again I think it is frightening.
First, lol to “Unless reigned in. . .” because if not meant as a clever pun, it should’ve been!
Second, life begins with total self-absorption, and it’s a good thing or humans would have died out. Great parenting is helping little kids get all their mundane and audacious wants and needs met, to totally adore them and marvel at them so they won’t desperately spend their whole lives looking for that love and validation! (Yep, Lindsey Lohan is a fine example.) Once met in abundance, needs and wants can mature up the moral ladder so little humans can gradually not focus on themselves. The neediest adults I know are the ones raised by well-meaning authoritarians determined to teach them not to get their needs met.
I am not saying be authoritarian, but I do not feel you should meet every want (needs yes- there is a difference). Children are totally self absorbed so giving them every want or focusing on every whim and saying they are the best, the brightest etc can spell disaster if that is all you instill in them. Yes you should totally adore and marvel the innocence- life to a child is a journey and discovery beyond belief every single day. As a parent it is a learning situation during every phase of their life. They do not come with directions or a recipe. I certainly have made plenty of mistakes with my two getting the mix just right. I have learned a lot and have looked back upon some things wishing I could change or tweak. But for the most part they are not self absorbed (BTW they did have their needs met but NOT their every wants and they have pretty good morals).
I think there is a difference between being confident and being self-absorbed. Young children naturally think they are the center of the universe; it is when parents reinforce this notion to the point where the child grows up believing they are the center of the universe and more important and entitled than others that we have a problem. For example, when you see kids at a soccer game/whatever ordering their parents and the parents jump to indulge every demand. Water NOW! Snack NOW! This shit drives me insane – my kid will get his own damn water bottle and it is his responsibility to keep up with it.
I don’t believe in mollycoddling my kids. I don’t always take their side – at least, not until I have heard the whole story. I believe they need to understand that they are responsible for their actions, accidental or intentional. On the other hand, I also believe very strongly in ensuring that they have a healthy self-esteem and encourage creativity, analysis, and going their own way.
So far, things seem to be working. I will hold final opinion until they reach 30.
Southern Female Lawyer I so admire your wonderful writing and communication skills. You have made my point so eloquently as that is all I was trying to say. Love the word “mollycoddling” it creates a wonderful visual for me! Let kids be kids- but do it responsibly.
As far as the final opinion until they are 30 my oldest is soon to be 28 so I guess I only have 2 more years to screw things up for her! ( Actually she is a wonderful woman and I hope someday she will have a daughter JUST LIKE HER.) She is an artist and has a very creative mind with a few quirks thrown in for good measure. She has a good sense of herself but not too far over the top. She sees and interprets things through a different mindset. She has compassion and a willingness to provide a helping hand when needed. She has grown so much from her childhood and it has been one of the true pleasures of my life to know I was somewhat responsible for this magnificent human being. Visit her at http://www.randomassembly.com (however it should be noted some back issues are not intended for little ones)